Birth Story Part II/III: An Advocate, Did I Need More?
The number 6. My Obstetrician did what she absolutely could for me. Looking back, I realize I may have wanted to have more people on my team to help me address what no one knew.
Part 2- My OB does what she can to be there for me, the number 6
My whole pregnancy, I educated myself and my partner on what happens with a cascade of intervention and induction, what I wanted to avoid, and what I needed from him. My greatest fear is that I might have needed more—a midwife or a doula to bridge the relationship gap of eastern and western processes, to have the best outcome.
Conception and birth ultimately require a perfect biological cocktail to process the natural cascade of hormones from the pituitary gland to the end of the womb. The pituitary gland releases oxytocin once a certain protein from the baby’s lungs releases into the mother’s blood stream. Oxytocin is the love hormone that helps the body, relax, open, and bond, dilating the cervix for descent.
It is known that 20% of induced labors fail to actually begin after induction1. It is also known that inductions increase pain rates because they force the body before it’s ready. This force to open stifles the ability to manage what would have been a natural escalation and titration of pain. This shocking level of pain then leads to an higher lieklihood for the use of fentanyl which enters the baby's blood stream before baby’s first breath of life2. As per my doctor, the longer some wait to induce, the greater increased risk there is for c-section.
Despite the scientific evidence and statistics that can be fear mongering in the medical industry, an industry that is highly run on business and financial tactics, babies have been making their perfectly timed arrivals for centuries. Going to 42 weeks, or beyond, is normal for some people.
Regardless of someones choice for natural labor, induction, or elective cesarean, there needs to be a level of trust in the birthing process. To birth something requires surrender to the unfolding of what we cannot always see. For we are so human and don’t always know the greater picture. We are of spirit, choosing faith and belief in what is. We are human with the ability to choose in our free-will just as much as we are spirit with the ability to tune into what is, the abundance of love and eternal existence.
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On Thursday night 2/22, I spoke to my partner and let him know I was making this executive decision to not go forward with this induction that night. Due to baby’s positioning and limited time to mentally prepare for what I never wanted, I knew I couldn’t bring my baby into the world under the amount of stress I was feeling.
I spent the next 12 hours religiously working to turn the baby using Spinning Babies techniques to help him find the right position for labor. This work of turning the baby is where I wish I had a midwife or body worker to connect with over pregnancy. This is the intervention I needed.
Either way, as I promised myself and my partner, I scheduled the next attempt of induction for Saturday morning on 2/24, I was ready to get this over with. Weeks on end of labor symptoms with no process and a growing belly— I was already down the tunnel of anxiously awaiting to meet my little one.
Keeping my family updated, mother knows best: she advised that I really should have been in contact with my OB and making the induction decision directly with her and not just her colleague. Intuitively, I had previously expressed this to my partner. To hear my mom mention it, my intuition felt validated. I knew I needed to chat with my doctor- I had been making decisions with her for the last 6 months, why let the biggest decision slip through now?
A few hours later my doctor actually called me in the middle of her hospital shift to ask if I really wanted to be induced on a Saturday morning. This felt like a big deal and the phone call I deserved. She recommended at this stage to start induction at night as it’s the easiest stage where women can get rest as they start the early dilation process. As I mentioned, I was mentally ready to do this on Saturday, so she obliged.
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But then she called back, “Erin, I’m going to be at the hospital on Monday night, I want to be there for your labor with the chance to deliver the baby, are you sure you don’t want to start induction on Sunday night instead?” Something spoke to me in this process that said, if my trusted doctor is calling me twice to encourage her presence, I want to listen to what the universe is presenting to me. She called me a few more times, took the time to change the schedule around, and made sure I’d be in good hands.
A piece of wisdom: I pulled an oracle card sometime that week and the title was “Mind Your Monkey Business.” The wisdom of the card mentions that anything that happens in your life is your business, anything that happens in someone else’s is theirs, and anything affecting the complexities is God’s. I wanted the dynamic of what was being presented to lead, to let my power and her power combine to create whatever was brewing in the complexity of it all.
With her suggestions, and trusting the complexities coming up, I was going to be induced on Sunday, 2/25 and I’d have my loving doctor right there with me. This felt so settling and supportive.
Six
That same day, I received a phone call from a beloved cousin who said she had a dream about me a few nights ago. She dreamt that I named the baby “Six” and she found it incredibly odd but shared anyway.
Ironically, weeks ago, I had previously asked the universe to send me the sign of the nurturing, motherly number of 666 to indicate when I was going to go into labor.
I believe her dream was the sign I was waiting for.
I find signs come when I’m least seeking them, when they simply appear out of nowhere. Hard to decipher at first, the energy is always there.
It dawned on me that arriving at the doctors office the day before, I saw 999 just as we turned into the doctors office parking lot. I had also had my own dream weeks before all of this seeing the number 999 on a street sign. I remember writing it off because I was disappointed and communicated with the universe that I was seeking the number six, not nine. Nines represent endings on the way to new beginnings. Messages are there for us only if we are willing to read them and accept them with objectivity and without judgement.
The chapter of pregnancy was ending, one way or another.
Read Part III Here…It’s long, I’m warning you!
Gülmezoglu AM, Crowther CA, Middleton P, et al. Induction of labour for improving birth outcomes for women at or beyond term. Cochrane Database Syst Rev. 2012;13(6):CD004945.
Lothian JA. Healthy birth practice #4: avoid interventions unless they are medically necessary. J Perinat Educ. 2014 Fall;23(4):198-206. doi: 10.1891/1058-1243.23.4.198. PMID: 25411540; PMCID: PMC4235054.